Would you even hit a girl? [For Guys]

[† Mute point]

If you underestimate a girl, or anyone else in a fight, you've already lost.

[Alegend1994]

If you underestimate a girl, or anyone else in a fight, you've already lost.

The thing is I don't underestimate anyone, usually, it's just that I find it hard to react back if a girl tries to pick a fight with me. Usually I can argue with them but if they try to hit me I either dodge or stop them, or if I think they can beat the S**t out of me I run =).

[Krogothwolf]

If you underestimate a girl, or anyone else in a fight, you've already lost.

I would have no problems hitting you in a fight mute!(I'd probably lose said fight though, but at least I'll have tried!)

If a girl comes at you I see no problem hitting them. And with girls being police officers, soldiers, security guards and what not, it's not like they are wimps or anything. Shit have you seen those MMA girls, I would not want to fight one of them! I don't understand the whole "never hit a girl." crap nowadays. I understand don't abuse a girl, or attack a girl for no reason, but if you're having a physical fight with someone it doesn't matter the sex in the end.

[Bluenoser]

As a girl I'll tell you guys right now, if she hits you hit her back. She deserves it. There are way too many girls out there that think they own everything and will walk all over you guys. They NEED to be taught a lesson. Nobody, not even a girl, should hurt someone not expecting to get hurt back.

I chose the last option in the poll because it is closest to my reality for this question. I will and have hit a female in self defence. Which is the same with males. I do not start physical fights, I never have, I don't like them and see them as a sign of defeat personally because when you fight with your fists instead of with your mind you have returned to being an animal, not a sentient entity. Now, I am older than most of you, and grew up when the mindset of never hitting a female was still by far the norm (mind you women's lib/equality was still a major fight back then too) but even then I believed the same. I do not care who it is, no one has the right to freely and without consequence use force against another, PERIOD!

Now, I've read a lot in this thread (and yes I read the whole thread, I always read a thread before commenting in it, it is my way) about how men are stronger than women making it unfair blah blah blah. What it really is is that men have more upper body strength because there is more muscle tissue so on average pound for pound/kilo for kilo males will have some advantage over women in this regard, it is biological reality. That is though only an average, not an absolute, there will always be exceptions both by nature and from training, and I find it more than a little irksome to see it used to excuse hitting a female at all while it is fine to whale on males who are not of equal mass (this is a sore point for me having been one of those males growing up, I had a slight wiry frame with good muscle tone but never much mass who was a favourite target of those bigger than me because I also have severe ADHD which meant I had little to no emotional control making me a wonderful target for bullying). I also got to enjoy females bullying me for the same reasons, right until I started hitting back, then they cried about how unfair it was for me to hit back because they were gurrls even though they were bigger and more physically powerful than me.

My view then is the same as now, no one has the right to hit another first, and once you hit someone you automatically become a fair target to be hit back in self defence whether you are a male or female. Period. It really is that simple in my books. Now, do I think people should be aware of how much force they use and how well their targets can withstand it? Of course, if a well muscled person of 170lbs takes on a 110 lbs person then it is obvious that the lighter person (unless they have advanced martial arts training of some sort) is at a serious disadvantage for throwing force as well as withstanding it REGARDLESS OF THE GENDERS INVOLVED! That is what needs to be taken into account whenever such is looked at, not the genders involved but the respective abilities and physical natures of each combatant.

I understand why for some it is wrong to ever hit a female, and being friends with many female victims of abuse (including my wife) in my life leaves me with some emotional sympathy for this view, but for me the reality is always going to be that no one ever has the right to physically abuse/hit another except in self defence (since as a society we empower law enforcement and military to be the only legal members of our society to use force against us) or defence of another unable to defend themselves. Gender is irrelevant to this notion, and since I have always believed in treating everyone as a human being equal in rights to each other until they prove otherwise this includes women being fair targets if they cross the rule I just spelled out, to do other is to treat them with a double standard with all the inherent issues that come with such.

That's my answer to this question, and it is one that has not changed since I was a youth to my approaching middle age self today, and I doubt it ever will change.

[damdavl]

Yes I am sure I would be willing to hit a women if the situation called for it. They only way I can see it happening is if she attacks something dear to me, though it wouldn't really matter wether guy or girl. If I would hit a guy for something I would hit a girl for the same reason.

[griver_007]

Only and if only I encounter a babe like Ryoko Asakura, Revy or Fujiko Minne will I ever hit a girl.

[winner1017]

loaded question...I can't say I would. I mean, if the girl had a gun or knife and i was near death...but I can't do that. It's like hitting a kid or animal. It goes against my nature. You know, I can't think of anything worse than a person who physically abuses someone else. we've got a mouth and two ears for a reason.

[Shinigami King]

I would under 3 normal situations.

1. She comes at me with the intent to seriously hurt me.

2. Girls that try to walk all over me, just because men before live by that "unwritten rule"

3. she does this.

DJVBsUX-zCM

I consider that, a crime that deserves the death penalty, and If it actually happened to me, I'd probably do the same thing to her kid, so long as it wasn't made by me, and I know your argument "you can always buy another PS3", here's my reply "Well, you can always make another kid", but this is all coming from the part of me that I try to keep caged, though I will admit I have anger problems, it really is offset by the fact that is literally where I begin to get pissed off.

[mfZero]

I'm afraid of girls. I'm pretty small, so most of them could probably beat me up.

[Alegend1994]

(Read the rest on the actual post)

That's my answer to this question, and it is one that has not changed since I was a youth to my approaching middle age self today, and I doubt it ever will change.

Yeah I guess that a girl has never tried to start a physical fight with me, I'm just trying to guess my reaction if one did. Also, not trying to change your view I'm just trying to justify mine, I try to avoid a physical fight but I come to situations where I can't not hit someone, there are some people that just don't listen to reasoning. Like if someone is just constantly verbally abusing someone, bullying basically, then I'll step in and try and stop it, which most of the time ends up with a fight. Also when there is a group of people physical bullying someone I can't hold the anger in and have to just unleash it on them, most of the time it's 3 on 1 so half the time I get the S**t beaten out of me but it's better than not doing anything to help the person being bullied.

loaded question...I can't say I would. I mean, if the girl had a gun or knife and i was near death...but I can't do that. It's like hitting a kid or animal. It goes against my nature. You know, I can't think of anything worse than a person who physically abuses someone else. we've got a mouth and two ears for a reason.

If a girl tried to kill me then yeah I would definitely hit her back, that's a life or death situation.

I consider that, a crime that deserves the death penalty, and If it actually happened to me, I'd probably do the same thing to her kid, so long as it wasn't made by me, and I know your argument "you can always buy another PS3", here's my reply "Well, you can always make another kid", but this is all coming from the part of me that I try to keep caged, though I will admit I have anger problems, it really is offset by the fact that is literally where I begin to get pissed off.

Yeah I know what you mean I have that part of me that I try to keep caged up but every now and again I just loose control of it and want to let it out. I guess it starts because I hide my minor angers, like when I see a guy showing off how he's cheating on his girlfriend or mocking someone for not wearing brands like they are and stuff like that, then when I see something that shakes my very soul I loose all rational thinking and just let it out, I hate myself for it but in the moment I can't control it.

[Bluenoser]

Yeah I guess that a girl has never tried to start a physical fight with me, I'm just trying to guess my reaction if one did. Also, not trying to change your view I'm just trying to justify mine, I try to avoid a physical fight but I come to situations where I can't not hit someone, there are some people that just don't listen to reasoning. Like if someone is just constantly verbally abusing someone, bullying basically, then I'll step in and try and stop it, which most of the time ends up with a fight. Also when there is a group of people physical bullying someone I can't hold the anger in and have to just unleash it on them, most of the time it's 3 on 1 so half the time I get the S**t beaten out of me but it's better than not doing anything to help the person being bullied.

I wasn't aiming my comment at anyone in particular, I didn't intend for it to be taken as such when I quoted seirachan, it was just her comment was a good starting point for me, nothing more. Having said that, I would point out that within my comment I said for self defence and in defence of another(s) in need of such protection was what I considered physical force acceptable to use, so your points here fall within that parameter with me. While I dislike physical fights and make it a point not to start them (aka throw the first blow) that does not mean I am a door mat either, or will simply stand by and watch others being abused/bullied (especially since I used to be the one being bullied with no-one ever willing to come to my aid, I had a very lonely childhood and was the favourite target of everyone, even others that normally got picked on, and they never seemed to want to face me one on one, it was always at least 3-6-more to one and usually I would be the slightest build of the group as well) without intervening.

As to not being able to control your anger, I learned early in life that is too dangerous for me, I have a *VERY* dangerous temper, which totally confuses people on the rare occasion that they see it because my normal disposition is very easygoing, mild, and rational to the point of tediousness to many, intense deep cold rage is not something normally associated to my character until it is seen, and it is a very cold and deep rage too, not the more common hot blustery rage most people seem inclined towards. I took a rake to a neighbour's head when I was only 7 years old knowing full well what I was doing, and she spent the next couple of days in the hospital and needed stitching as well (no, I am not going into why she got hit, the fact that no charges were even considered against me though should illustrate it was not because I was the primary aggressor, I just used more than needed force to defend myself, but given she was 5 years older and a lot bigger, welllllll). I could easily have killed her in that state knowing exactly what I was doing, and as I've aged that side of me has not mellowed. I keep it under *VERY* heavy lock and key, because when it comes out all my compassion, caring, empathy, all my warm traits which make me such a decent person and someone so many people turn to for help go away, but all the skills those traits have developed in knowing how to help/heal people become weapons to harm and maim instead, and I use them precisely and without mercy with utter ruthlessness. So I get rage and anger, I really do. Losing control of it though is something to be avoided wherever and whenever possible, letting it out is one thing, letting it run wild is quite another, and that is something one should only do when one is truly fighting for one's life or the life of another, nothing less IMHO.

So in general I don't really see much difference between us after all, certainly not enough to think either of us has much cause/basis to need to change the other's view on this topic overall. OF course if you disagree please feel free to point out where and how.

[margret]

apparently not all guys go by this rule not to hit girls . I'm a girl and I've been hit more the once by a guy. well the second time was kinda my fault I picked a fight.. and I freaking won XD... he hit like a 5 year old girl...XD

[† Emotional Outlet]

On the topic of equality, which seems to be misunderstood by many, the calls for equality between genders is not an attempt to convince people that everyone is the same. You can't even achieve total sameness within the genders, much less across them. It's more a call for equal opportunity--no shaming a woman for not being "feminine" enough, no shaming a man for not being "masculine" enough, and, as far as this thread is concerned, no shaming a person for defending themselves against a female assailant.

Having taken some form of martial arts (krav maga) before I stopped due to schedule conflicts (also because the military hates me having a life or something), I find it somewhat interesting that there are people out there who are surprised when they find a female can strike with some force. At some point, when we were practising breaking chokes, I had one of my classmates (a much larger, definitely taller male) express surprise that I was choking him so hard. I also found that people tend to be a little half-hearted when choking me, which rather defeats the purpose of taking the classes, but a beginner class it was.

At least one of the females I was working with was reluctant to use any amount of force while we were practising striking, to the point where the instructor had to come by and tell her it was okay to hit harder, especially considering how hard I was hitting her. Which isn't to say I'm a force to be reckoned with (maybe in a shouting match), of course. Not in the least.

I definitely agree with the concept of never underestimating an opponent. One of my dear friends is smaller than me (I'd say he's about my weight [130 pounds] with a smaller waist [25 inches to my 27 inches] and slightly taller [5'7" to my 5'5", I'd say]), and by no means a weakling. He is scrawny, but so help you if you try to take him down. You never know what kind of training a person has gone through, and I doubt finding out the hard way is the best way.

[Saidon]

Never have, never will.

When you think about it though, say you've been married for 15 years to the love of your life and had kids etc, then you rock up home one day to find she's cheating on you. No one here can 100% say "I wouldn't hit her". Like think about how it will destroy you psychologically, you might perhaps be in a state of mind where you can't tell your left hand to your right. So it's really hard to say in that case alone. Although I'd definatelly murder the guy she's cheating with LOL

[SwordOfWar]

I would only resort to hitting a women if it was necessary to prevent any type of serious harm.

I'm obviously not going to sit there and take a bad beating. If possible I'll just restrain the woman.

[VolvoKing]

The only time I would hit a woman is in play. I would give her a smack on the butt.

[Zanco]

I'd never hit a girl... I learned my lesson from last time. Women should be treated with respect, nothing more, nothing less.

[† RazorDan]

when girls hit me, they usually are just messing around. I act hurt when they do, and it makes them all guilty lol. however, It's quite easy to restrain a normal girl, so I'd do that instead of hitting back. Tickling and poking is also effective

[Alegend1994]

(Read actual post since it's long for a quote)

So in general I don't really see much difference between us after all, certainly not enough to think either of us has much cause/basis to need to change the other's view on this topic overall. OF course if you disagree please feel free to point out where and how.

I love seeing your opinions on these sort of debates because a lot of the time you open my eyes to things that I haven't thought of before so thank you so much for that.

Sorry for forgetting about your self-defense views sometimes it takes me about 30 minutes to write something in the Mako Reactor section which I edit a lot during this time so I usually forget what point I'm trying to get across.

I hate my actions as a teenager when I was 14-15 because I was an absolute dick and used to pick on people when my friends would, even now I feel like beating myself up from the rage I get from thinking of how I could be so evil. So I'm trying to redeem myself now by helping victims of bullying even if is ends up putting me in the hospital, which it has.

Also I can't believe how stupid I am because before I bullied I had been bullied so I still don't understand why I did it after knowing how I felt. This fits in with your story about the ones who got picked on still bullied themselves, which confuses me to no end and just reduces my believe in humanity.

I actually wasn't surprised when I heard that you have a dangerous temper because me and my friend are a little bit like that we try to be as rational as we can and listen to most of people's opinions before making a decision or taking an action but there is a limit, especially when we are together because I guess that we amplify each others rage when we see something completely evil. We just do stuff that shock us after we look at what we have done, I would give examples but I hate remembering these things that I have done and even start feeling like knocking myself unconscious when admitting them to people. I believe that running at full speed for a couple of minutes, until I faint most of the time, helps to sustain this anger a bit for me.

After thinking about it you might be right we are fairly similar and really we have the same view on this topic so really we are just expanding our views on this topic instead of trying to change each other views.

apparently not all guys go by this rule not to hit girls . I'm a girl and I've been hit more the once by a guy. well the second time was kinda my fault I picked a fight.. and I freaking won XD... he hit like a 5 year old girl...XD

Actually to be completely honest I will friendly tap a girl on the arm to scare them or if I want to do something different to greet them, obviously I know the girl but I don't see this as actually hitting them because it's a tap.

I like your story of winning a fight against guy that hit like a 5 year old, as long as it was a friendly fight, because I used to have this girl that I would slightly bump into and she would react by punching me which carried on until I gave up =), it was a usual greeting we would do which she started and I will always remember her by.

Also it's funny how liking someone can so easily make you change your mind because me and this girl have started this friendly punching game and greet each other randomly every now and again with a tap on the arm.

(Read actual post since it's long for a quote)

I definitely agree with the concept of never underestimating an opponent. One of my dear friends is smaller than me (I'd say he's about my weight [130 pounds] with a smaller waist [25 inches to my 27 inches] and slightly taller [5'7" to my 5'5", I'd say]), and by no means a weakling. He is scrawny, but so help you if you try to take him down. You never know what kind of training a person has gone through, and I doubt finding out the hard way is the best way.

I know a couple of people that are like this and underestimate the ability of women and mock them when they are talking about self-defense they are doing, I wish they would show those guys what they could really do but luckily they are so much more respectful than these jerks so I love them for that. I know this might sound like I'm being hypocritical but it's not that I believe that women aren't capable of beating men but it's just that I've grown up knowing that I should respect women and I've obviously got the wrong idea about this, so I'm trying to fix this.

Never have, never will.

When you think about it though, say you've been married for 15 years to the love of your life and had kids etc, then you rock up home one day to find she's cheating on you. No one here can 100% say "I wouldn't hit her". Like think about how it will destroy you psychologically, you might perhaps be in a state of mind where you can't tell your left hand to your right. So it's really hard to say in that case alone. Although I'd definatelly murder the guy she's cheating with LOL

This was one thing I was thinking about, not in this topic but with a friend, but I believe that my morals and opinions will be thrown out of the window in this situation since my whole beliefs from 15 years with this person would seem wrong and all of a sudden I wouldn't know what was right or wrong, at least this was the conclusion I got to with my friend.

[† Emotional Outlet]

I hate my actions as a teenager when I was 14-15 because I was an absolute dick and used to pick on people when my friends would, even now I feel like beating myself up from the rage I get from thinking of how I could be so evil. So I'm trying to redeem myself now by helping victims of bullying even if is ends up putting me in the hospital, which it has.

Also I can't believe how stupid I am because before I bullied I had been bullied so I still don't understand why I did it after knowing how I felt. This fits in with your story about the ones who got picked on still bullied themselves, which confuses me to no end and just reduces my believe in humanity.

Well, at the least, you can take some comfort in knowing that this isn't uncommon. Typically--and I'm not saying this has anything to do with you, just relating it to something else--people who grew up in abusive households tend to be abusive themselves, so I don't see why it would be any different for people who were bullied. It's just the way people knew things and the way they were taught things worked. There could be any number of reasons for it--you're the only one, though, who will know exactly what it is for you. I don't get paid to psychoanalyse people, haha.

I do commend you for your efforts in helping victims of bullying! I hope you manage to get through any issues you may have when you were bullying people--if you need someone to talk to, I'm sure there are people here willing to listen to you vent. I offer an ear if you need one, and I'm sure my husband would be willing to offer some of his views.

I know this might sound like I'm being hypocritical but it's not that I believe that women aren't capable of beating men but it's just that I've grown up knowing that I should respect women and I've obviously got the wrong idea about this, so I'm trying to fix this.

There's nothing wrong with being respectful towards women and men. Respect doesn't mean you have to think they're weak and incapable or that you can't defend yourself if someone is coming at you because they're a woman, haha.