† Emotional Outlet Posted March 27, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2012 Ever since I've read that article, although I haven't taken to actually squatting (I'm afraid of falling in), I do lean forward and lift my heels on occasion. Better than nothing, I suppose, haha.This thread totally happened. Right here. Right now.Speaking of horrible public toilets, I went into a Popeye's restroom once, all ready to pee, and then I saw that somehow, there was poop smeared all over the toilet? And toilet paper everywhere? So I just... washed my hands and left. Held my pee until I got home, haha. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemmingllama Posted March 27, 2012 Report Share Posted March 27, 2012 Oh you think that poop on a toilet is bad? Two different funny occasions(well not for me at the time). So first one was a gas station bathroom. Someone actually took a dump in a condom, then used it to smear poop over the walls and ceiling... WHY!!!!!! As for the other one, some idiot kid at a burger joint missed the toilet apparently(wtf how??) and it got on the floor. Then he walked out, swinging open the door which caught the shit and dragged it as it pulled shut. My friend had to clean the floor, he actually just flooded the floor for a bit to get rid of it.@job A swirly is when you get your head shoved into a toilet and then someone flushes it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
† Emotional Outlet Posted March 27, 2012 Author Report Share Posted March 27, 2012 That is literally horrible. Everything about that is horrible. How do you even use a condom as a receptacle for your waste. I just. Why.Somewhat related--when we don't clean the litterbox every day, the cats seem to get their revenge on us by just not burying their little turds. I'll walk by the box and be like... "Oh, I see this lovely brown pile of cat poop. THANKS, GUYS." My cat at home with my dad is a medium hair, so when she poops, sometimes she'll get little turds stuck on her hindquarters and walk around with them until she finally notices them and knocks them off. Anywhere, really, in the house. And one of my dad's previous girlfriends had a cat that plant her butt on the carpet and scoot around. I'm sure she had her reasons. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dae314 Posted March 27, 2012 Report Share Posted March 27, 2012 That is literally horrible. Everything about that is horrible. How do you even use a condom as a receptacle for your waste. I just. Why.At least he didn't turn it inside-out and try to use it.......... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KaoclazmMJR Posted March 28, 2012 Report Share Posted March 28, 2012 @dae you're giving lama ideas..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
† Emotional Outlet Posted April 8, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 8, 2012 Turning a condom inside out is just cruel to the person subjected to it. How would they even manage to keep it on in the first place? Your mind is a dark place, Dae!The other day I relayed my stealth poop story to some coworkers and they told me that stealth poops don't actually exist. I think they do; they are just rare.How many people have talked to someone on the phone while in the restroom? I can't remember if I've specifically done it, but there have been a couple times when I was on the phone with someone who was in the restroom and didn't inform me until they flushed. Invariably this has been males in my experience, but maybe there are some females who like to tinkle with their phone? It is somewhat disconcerting to me because sometimes I don't hear them wash their hands afterwards. It is concerning. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemmingllama Posted April 8, 2012 Report Share Posted April 8, 2012 Well, some people talk on the phone but really it isnt a good thing. I have heard lots of stories about people dropping phones into toilets. One lady I know spent an hour thinking about whether or not to put her hand in and get it, since there was urine in there... Also, why would someone on the phone wash their hands? They are already busy with the phone! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
† Emotional Outlet Posted April 8, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 8, 2012 I bring my phone sometimes when I am pooping because I like to play Solitaire to pass the time. I also tend to read while on the toilet. If I dropped my phone in the toilet and I only peed in it, I would retrieve my phone, no question. I can handle a little pee. If there was faeces, though... Of course, I'm not allowed to bring my phone to work, so I don't have to have this existential crisis on the military's dime, haha.And I guess I am worried about their other hand? Unless they are super cool and have bluetooth or something, but at that point, they should be able to wash their hands if they are using a hands free device! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemmingllama Posted April 8, 2012 Report Share Posted April 8, 2012 Really, there are more important things to think about. Like how they were able to wipe and get their pants on with one hand(since you didnt notice it, and im sure that you would hear something at this point )And onto a new topic, have you ever hit a door or stall wall while someone was in there, then run away? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
† Emotional Outlet Posted April 8, 2012 Author Report Share Posted April 8, 2012 I can wipe and pull up my pants with one hand, and some of them I can fasten back up with one hand. Just... washing with one hand seems very ineffective. I don't know. People shouldn't be on the toilet and talking on the phone!And no, I have never done that, but Java sometimes likes to bang on the door while I'm on the toilet to scare me. I think it is mean and disconcerting! Being on the toilet is such a vulnerable position, haha. It's never happened to me in any other situation, though I think a little kid tried to get in once before her mom took control of her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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