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So there's this girl.


renovalentine

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Right not sure if I'm making this thread in the right place so sorry if its not.

So theres this girl. I've known her about six years now and we used to be really close mates we used to do everything together have loads of fun and from time to time we used to "mess" around if you know what i mean. Which was fine until i started to develop feelings for her and at one time one of best friends tells me they were mutual feelings. As time went on she got over it and had different boyfriends but my feelings only grew and i did the stupid thing and not tell her of these feelings partially because i respected the friendship and partially because an idiotic buffoon. For a long time I just tried to ignore these feelings and hope they would go away it also ruined a couple of relationships i had with other girls because they said they knew i liked her and not them. So in the end i decided the best thing for me to do was walk away and not see her in fact not really see many people because we had the all same friends and hope that these feelings would go away as it wasn't fair on anyone and after a long long time it seemed to have worked.

Lately I've started going out a lot more again and I'm seeing her more and more often. Then last week I got very drunk at a party "can't remember that much of it BTW" but i remember her getting me to a bed and making sure i was going to be OK. Now I've got these feelings rushing back at me at 100 MPH and to top it all off she's just started seeing an old friend of mine.

So.

1) Am I a crazy lunatic who is obsessed and needs professional help?

2) Do I grin and bear it?

3) Do I say something?

4) Open to suggestions.....

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regardless of how you feel about her right now you might want to back off if shes seeing some one right now, I don't think that would be fair to anyone. Trust me when I say that it's best to have said something before she was seeing some other guy then to just move on and forget about it. Who knows, she might have liked you back in the same way too. And if it didn't work out then you would have had no regrets (unless one did something stupid).

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First of all mate you have let this game go too far. If you had feelings for her then you should've told her that right away. If you tried to forget her and then found that you couldn't, then you should've expressed your feelings to her immediately. But you didn't and look where it had got you. Don't worry, you ain't a lunatic or something, you are just madly in love with her.

Now here's my suggestion, be patient. If you could've waited for her for about six years, you can wait a little longer. Hope that your friend and the girl's relationship does not carry on long. Then when your next chance comes grab it. Don't let sentimental rubbish like "she's my friend" get in your way. Finally if she accepts your proposal then all is well. If she rejects then accept it don't do anything stupid. That's all I can tell you now.

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1.

Angel beats is a great example here, actually the last 10 minutes or fatestay night.

If you "like" her in a non obsessive way you need the will power to let her go because your holding yourself back.

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Ok cheers everyone you've all been a great help. To be honest i feel a lot better just talking about it so cheers for taking the time to read about my issue and respond with great advise as well.

3) Do I say something? Yes!!!! Do not continue to grin and bear the pain, you have already been doing that.

Although Leviathan makes good points as well, "be patient" and "don't do anything stupid", it seems you have already been through a lot.

Like Rand did, Good Ending series explores parts of the situation you are in however it's still an ongoing series.

Then again, you're not done yet either bro:byebye:

P.s. WHY ISN'T THERE A SINGLE INPUT FROM A KAMETSU LADY?

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wow I see quite a lot of pretty familiar advice. I have been in a pretty much identical situation as you reno, with a girl I still like. When I asked for my friend's advice they said everything that has been said here. So I followed that advice, and now I barely talk to her. Yeah, not all roses and chocolate.

It is a very delicate situation you are in my friend and just blindly talking to her won't work. At least if you are really good friends (which I am assuming) it might not be the best of ideas. Now I know I'm probably going to get jumped on now, but this ain't shitty hollywood romantic comedy so I don't care. My situation ended up with 2 months of bliss till the shit hit the fan. Not cause of either of us, but other friends, siblings and idiots. You would be surprised the amount of damage scorned women can do when you spend more time with their friend than them. So, we grew apart after breaking up. We could barely just save the friendship. But we did promise that at some point we'll meet up and start again. Unfortunately I don't know if this will happen as I'm moving to the other side of the world and she has been going out with a guy for the better part of the year. So not sure. But imo, it was worth it for that time together. So it really is your choice.

PS. Just don't do anything to soppy. I sent a "Pride and Prejudice"-esque question and turned up at her house at three in the morning to put flowers on her windowsill for when she woke up. Cheesey as hell, but good times.

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P.s. WHY ISN'T THERE A SINGLE INPUT FROM A KAMETSU LADY?

Hi!

You are not crazy, but you have let it eat away at you for a mite long. Depending on the kind of girl she is, knowing that you have feelings for her may not necessarily ruin your friendship with her. It's natural and not the end of the world. I have been attracted to my friends and have had friends attracted to me--it doesn't mean you have to stop being friends immediately because a romance is out of the question, haha.

If you're still close to her, I don't think it's out of the question to just hang out with her some time and get it off your chest. There can be a significant cathartic effect when you just say what you're feeling, even if you can't act on it. I'm glad, though, that you at least feel better telling us about it if nothing else. I certainly can't recommend getting between her and her new beau, though. That's just asking for trouble.

Again, this all depends on the type of girl she is. For me, I'm still friends with someone who used to have feelings for me. We tried it, it didn't work out, we moved on. No hard feelings, resentment, or disappointment. Not everyone is like that, so tread carefully.

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That's a prick of a situtation you're in. In my opinion i'd just tell her to get it off my chest just as long as she's still single (Hate ruining others relationships). Even if it does kind of ruin the friendship i'd prefer to confess my feelings rather than not because I may regret it further down the track. Just an opinion I thought to throw out there with what i'd do.

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