What defines 'me' is the world around me. also individual thought. one day I can like the color purple and anything that is purple until I notice something blue like the water or sky. Then I could like blue. simple enough, whatever happens to me or my way of thinking, it would still define me. opposed to trauma and physical abuse... it would still define you but not as a burden more like a reminder. I could have suffered a scar when I was young or witnessed someone be shot. and the end result after that trauma would still make me, me. What makes us, us. is that we are all alike indefinitely but we all observe differently. what makes me smile might not make another person smile, while someone can experience large amounts of stress while I don't feel it at all. I may look one way in the mirror but to someone else they can see me as something completely different.